Booo sucky nights.

Yesterday, was fun.

For the most part...

I got to the furnace around 11:45, and did the set (think worship team, worship hour, la dee da) with Susan, which was okay.

I'm really excited about prophetic singing lately. Sure, I suck, but at least I'm not a scared chicken about everything now. I mean, I keep on looking on how much I have gotten more confident in the last three weeks, compared to the last year 1/2....BIG DIFFERENCE...Susan (worship director, and also prayer leader on this) asked me to go on the piano afterwards and do a song since we had extra time, so I go up, and of course all the sudden, I get worship A.D.D, for all the other singers/musicians out there, do you ever go up there, and forget how that one part of the song went? Well, you get the point.

The rest of the day, before the bridegroom watch, I pretty much walked around brain-dead, ate, talked to people, talked on the phone. My friend had a pregnancy scare, my other friend had a cheating boyfriend scare. Ahhh, Teenage girls.

Well, since I've been on 2-3 sets a week with prophetic singing, I get a little more edgy in what I think....of course I get all crazy, ACTUALLY THINKING I'M GOOD...I told my parents that I'm really enjoying spontaneous singing, and how i'm getting better at it.

Okay, after bridegroom watch, Alicia says "Evie, come and sing with me on the compassion set." At that moment, I was not feeling good whatsoever, I really felt like I was going to puke, but I went up there thinking I could do it anyways. Alicia was prayer leading, and asking me to sing spontaneously after everything she prayed.

Well, since I was so self conscious about my, I don't know, I-feel-like-i'm-about-to-puke stage, I couldn't concentrate. I wasn't in a good spot. My headphones kept on going in and out, I couldn't hear anything, and, well, it wasn't good.

I think I sang two extremely random things that didn't have anything to do with what she was praying, and it was off-key, and I couldn't go along with what her husband was playing on the guitar. My parents were in the seats, hearing me really for the first time. I was uber-beyond-uber embarrassed. (And even now, I don't know why I was so embarrassed, lol)

I gave my apologies to Alicia, and went to go sit down. I told my parents I wanted to go home. They told me to wait outside, and that they would be out in a second.

I went outside. And waited by our car.

Okay, well, I don't cry often, and I don't get angry often. I'm a pretty happy person in general.

At that moment, I just got plain ol' upset. I cried, I didn't puke, but I felt like I wanted to. I waited outside for 25 minutes.
I didn't want to go inside and tell them to-get-their-butt's-out-here-right-now, because I was still embarrassed.

I talked on the phone to Margie, and Adam called me in the middle of it. Thank God. I think Adam and Margie are just about the most perfect people to talk to when anybody is upset. God knows how many times we have helped each other through teenage-drama.

Yeah, so I was angry my parents left me out there for such a long time. I'm not a psychopathic daughter who yells at her parents constantly.
I know my parents won't stand for that, but I don't like people treat me like crap when i'm sick. I deal with it enough, and I definitely don't want to deal with it then.

Okay. The official Evie-rant is over. Thanks for reading.